Taffy Bennington sings a song about portable phones and so will you.
LYRICS
my little screen is all I see
on freeways I'm a misery
the other drivers honk at me
but they don't understand that I am on my portable phone
I got me 50,000 friends
the circle jerk it never ends
I take a picture of my food
and post videos of me nude on my portable phone
portable phone, you are magic and magic
you control the universe and I love you
I look out at a see of stars when I'm looking down at my screen
it makes me happy to think of you, portable phone, whenever I am asleep
oftentimes I dream of you, portable phone
I hope that isn't too awkward to say
I love you
Taffy Bennington and Octopus Caveman star in a tv show and so will you.
(Starring @octopuscaveman and @taffybennington)
B-camera: Laffy Bennington
Director: Manichevitz Von Wobbledog
Music: Bingo Khakipants
Special thanks to Otto Bennington for the use of London and the MI5 building.
UNCLE SID JEWISON HERE. LISTEN. ROCK AND ROLL TIMES AREN'T PAYING THE BILLS AS MUCH THESE DAYS SO I HAD TO BREAK NEW WIND AS A BEVERAGE SALESMAN. YOU'RE GONNA LOVE MY NEW ALL-FLUID LIQUID AS SOON AS YOU DRINK IT, I PROMISE. PICKS YOU UP LIKE COCAINE BUT LETS YOU DOWN EASY, LIKE THE 50-YEAR-OLD DAUGHTER OF THE NIECE OF THE ROAD MANAGER FOR QUIET RIOT WHO I HOOKED UP WITH IN 82. SHE HAD HAIR THE SIZE OF RHODE ISLAND, BUT RHODE ISLAND LIKE YOU'RE LOOKING AT A MAP OF RHODE ISLAND, SO IT WAS SMALL. MY POINT IS THAT IT WAS SMALL HAIR BUT SHE LET ME DOWN EASY. IF YOU SEE SOMEONE DRIVING AROUND L.A. IN A RED PORSCHE CONVERTIBLE, THAT'S ME, BABY. UNCLE SID JEWISON, AGENT AND MANAGER TO THE STARS.
Taffy sings about a fur watermelon and so will you.
Mix by Otto Bennington
Director - Pringles Williams-Napkinholder, Jr.
Music - Mambo "Lance That Bunion!" Rattlebaby
Taffy jogging footage shot and directed by Laffy Bennington
Performance B-roll shot by Penn Jen
Special Thanks to Bloob and J. J. J. Schmidt and Phil H.
I believe in Bigfoot
I believe in Atlantis
I believe ancient aliens once visited Earth
Do you buy what I'm sellin'?
I believe in leprechauns
I believe there is something beneath the waves at Loch Ness
But most of all I believe
in Fur Watermelon
Fur Watermelon
I believe in the Atkins Diet
I believe daily meetings are the best way to motivate employees
I believe in hair products and mousse
which is why I put gel in
I believe in reverse mortgages
I believe full moons cause childhood polio
I believe I'll have some pop rocks and soda with this
Fur Watermelon